Dr. Dooom - You Live At Home With Your Mom

February 25th, 2005 by EJ

Kool Keith, listen…motherfucker you are crazy, you know that? When you were in Ultramagnetic MC’s back in 1990, your cousin Kenny was the building manager at my NYU dorm. He and I kicked it a few times puffin out blunts in the courtyard watching the runway models maxin at Coffee Shop on Union Square and him bragging about you. He was so proud of you, straight boasting to everyone who could hear him (who was down with the movement) about how you were a genius, blah blah blah. We were like, “Yeah, ok, sure thing.” Well, newsflash: he was right. I figured after hearing Dr. Octagon (which produced one of the most important hip-hop albums ever made, Dr. Octagonecologyst), and Kool Keith I would have never imagined you could have another personality holed up inside you, but yes. Only Kool Keith would have the ingenuity to bring Dr. Dooom in to kill off Dr. Octagon. First Come, First Served is, quite honestly, one of the illest, funniest hip-hop records I’ve ever heard. It’s way, way out there, because that’s what your brain took you to do — burning out a record filled with clever horror raps (”Apartment 223″), the ever-popular hip-hop skit done the RIGHT way (”Wild Kingdom”), and straight-up fall-out-the-chair-laughin-and-hit-ya-head-funny shit like “Welfare Love” and the cell-block crack-up of the century, “I Run Rap”. Who else would drop off wack MC’s with rhymes like “Starstruck with one buck/Ya girl look like Donald Duck/Party figure perpetrator/Undercover here to smell ya cheap cologne in the elevator”“? Only you, and only in this track called “You Live At Home With Your Mom”. Hip-hop fans ought to understand, but you may need to listen a few times to catch on to what’s really going on. But it doesn’t matter what you call yourself. You’re the fucking man, Keith. I left my jock saddle back at the ponderosa, so I’m gonna quit riding yours for a minute and let the people hear what I mean.